Recently I made a giant revelation about myself. I discovered I love flawed people. I am drawn to them like a moth to a flame and it seems the more flaws the better. It’s something I have always known about myself, but never really acknowledged it. Well, the time has come to put into words my attraction to flawed people.
But, before I do, I must share that I am fully aware of all of my flaws. Or at least my shortcomings by traditional society standard. I have openly shared them before in multiple columns so not to be to repetitive, I will graze over them quickly. I am overweight and have been my whole life. Plus, I have dyslexia which is a learning disability that makes reading and writing difficult. One flaw is very visible to everyone and one is not noticeable unless you have the good fortune of editing my writing.
With my acknowledged flaws it makes perfect sense that I would feel a kinship to others who are also damaged.
But here is where there is a twist. One that I only discovered last week when I was introduced to a book about a woman who over came child abuse and weight issues. Naturally, as I was reading it I found myself relating to her. Not because I ever suffered child abuse like she did, but because I have felt hurt in my life about my weight and that shared pain connected me to the author, Athena Perez.
The more I read the more I fell in love with her story. She survived a brutal childhood that led to a dysfunctional relationship with food, causing her to tip the scales at almost 500 pounds. In the book, “Lifting the Wait”, she described how her growing faith in God helped her find a way out of her pain and find enough confidence in herself to join a CrossFit gym that helped her lose almost 250 pounds.
The story was inspirational to say the least. Then came the chance to meet and talk to the author herself. Shockingly, I was a little intimidated at the thought of meeting her. I actually was concerned that since she dealt with her flaws she would be out of touch with those of us still struggling.
Also, her new found faith worried me. I know this sounds strange coming from a believer like myself, but truth be told, some people who openly profess their faith feel the need to be flawless or at least act flawless. And since I am a faith-filled but flawed believer, perfect is not in my vocabulary.
Work in Progress
All my fears evaporated the second I met her. First of all, she, like myself, is still a work in progress and while she found faith in God, she also said a cuss word or two. So clearly, she was not acting holier than thou.
Then it hit me. We are all flawed. Some we can see and others we cannot see, but in one way or another, we all have shortcomings and it wasn’t other peoples flaws that I was attracted to, but a person’s willingness to be authentic and let their flaws be exposed.
When someone allows themself to be vulnerable and authentic instead of fake and perfect, I am naturally drawn to them. That was my “Ah ha!” moment. My attraction had nothing to do with flaws and more to do with authenticity.
We are all imperfect and that is beautifully perfect. Life is mysterious.
To learn more about Athena Perez or read her book, go to her website athenamperez.com
I Have a Secret, Shhhhhh
P.S I have it on good authority that Athena will be releasing a second book shortly and she may be coming to the East Tennessee area very soon! Tune in for updates on how and when you can meet this beautiful soul.